5 years ago
MILF Mapper
  • Posted May 15, 2014
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By now it seems like we’re all familiar with the elusive MILF (mother I’d like to fornicate with).  In 1999 film American Pie coined the phrase and evolved the term to one of the most infamous acronyms in history.  MILFs are fun to think about, but where do we actually find these creatures?  Just like plants or trees, MILFs exist all over.  You can find one in a coat, or you can find one in a boat – below is a list of MILF magnet destinations.

Las Vegas Liaison

The most glamorous of all getaways, though this destination may seem broad-based, MILFs are rampant across the 4 mile radius of penny slots and drunken tourists.  One must realize that MILFs need to relax, and they’re in the city of sin for just that – sinful relaxation.  Try low-key spots, like Minus 5 at Mandalay Bay, to catch the eye of that crazy cougar.

Wine Wednesday’s

Most mothers live for vino.  Check out local restaurants and bars for wine specials like a standardized Wine Wednesday.  Aim for something less urban like DOC Wine Bar just outside of Chicago.  Check out this website for wine events in your area.

Yoga

Yoga has become a staple for suburban moms.  Intense yoga classes like Bikram help women to feel “transformed, less stressed, energized and slimmed down” according to this Downtown LA studio.  Make sure you do your research prior to attending – yoga is much more difficult than it might seem.

Health Food Stores

Have you seen the women that shop Whole Foods?  Hot moms take care of their bodies, right down to the chia seeds and fish oil they intake.  Become educated on fine white wines and offer a subtle suggestion to a potential hot mama at the local health food store.

Gay Clubs

No joke.  Hot moms flock to the gays to feel young, wild and free.  Check out a local drag show, but make sure to bring a few friends – you don’t want to attract the wrong kind of attention.

Best Cougar Dates:

  • Wine tasting
  • Go to a film at an independent theater
  • Attend a cooking class

Wherever the cougar, I’m sure she’ll be purring once she finds a playful cub to domesticate.  Her den is full of tricks untold, and you might get invited back to play.

Where have you met a MILF?

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